Park Seorin's life was pitiful.
She lived past twenty years and had yet to see her love blossom even once in these years.
She wasn't a bad match in the capital, she was sane and beautiful. But she didn't know why she didn't even have one suitor. It was an insane situation.
Her father was the prime minister, Park Jin Young. It was a pity she wasn't her father's golden daughter.
Park Jin Young was a poor scholar, he struggled to study for ten years. During that trial period, Seorin's mother Shin Hye supported him. Park Jin Young and Park Shin Hye had a loving relationship. Unexpectedly after he entered the palace to take the imperial examination, he caught Princess Ji Hoon's attention.
Park Jin Young faced a dilemma. On one side he loved Shin Hye and on the other side was his high ambition. His final decision was he wanted both and married Princess Ji Hoon.
He thought he would live an ideal life. But on his wedding night with the Princess, Shin Hye packed her belongings and returned to her family's country home. Shin Hye never returned to the imperial city even though she gave birth to Seorin in the countryside.
After Seorin's birth, half of Jin Young's heart was started to stay in the imperial city and the other half was with Shin Hye. Occasionally he visited his parents and Shin Hye in the countryside. He missed Shin Hye and wanted to visit more often but Princess Ji Hoon has a powerful influence that didn't allow him to visit them often.
More than ten years passed by quickly. Shin Hye worked hard to earn a living and died of pneumonia. When Jin Young found out Shin Hye died, he cried continuously. Then he brought Seorin to the imperial city. That year Seorin was only sixteen years old.
Usually, young ladies at the age of eighteen were the target of many matchmakers. But Seorin's family background wasn't ideal. Even though she was the prime minister's daughter, she didn't have high hopes for an ideal husband. Prominent men wanted to marry someone who was most compatible with them to elevate their status. In the prime minister's manor behind Seorin was his golden daughter. The golden daughter's mother was a princess and the princess was also the empress' blood sister.
Compared to Princess Ji Hoon's daughter, Seorin didn't have any powerful family connections and she was alone in the world. It was the main reason why many court officials didn't want to marry Seorin. Their eyes focused solely on the prime minister's golden daughter.
For four years Seorin stayed in an endless restless state in Hanyang, the imperial city. No suitors wanted to marry her. When she was free she thought about the two consequences of not having suitors. One, soon she would pass the desirable marriage age to start a family then it was logical that the ground below was forced to look at what was above. Second, her father stood behind Princess Ji Hoon to support the princess, and Seorin's marriage state wasn't an exception.
Although Seorin aged as each day passed, she didn't care if she became an old maid. When other people pitied her, she smiled and silently maintained her gentle and docile image.
She remembered what her mother instructed her before dying, 'the imperial city isn't like our countryside. After you leave the countryside, you can't follow your impulses. Princess Ji Hoon isn't someone you should offend. If you offend her, she'll take revenge. You need to be careful of your words and actions.'
Since Seorin lived in the imperial city, she listened to her mother's warning and controlled her words and actions. She quickly became well known in the imperial city for being gentle and docile.
In the beginning, she wasn't used to suppressing her impulses. Only she herself knows, she was someone who had a quick temper and restless. It was hard for her to be a well-behaved young lady who never showed her teeth while laughing. Luckily the more she acted gentle and docile, it gradually became a habit.
Within two years of living in the Hanyang when people were free and talked about the prime minister's oldest daughter, they would associate Seorin with gentle and docile. Of course, afterward, they would say that it was a pity someone so gentle and docile couldn't be married off.
Seorin didn't feel it was a pity. God knows she didn't care about being unwed and that she had already prepared to live an independent old maid's life.
But quickly it became clear that as she aged, someone else would see her marriage state as an obstacle in their path. She looked at the sky and inwardly realized a person could be an obstacle in relation to marriage.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seorin sat silently opposite her father in the courtyard.
Jin Young contemplated for a while about how much he owed his oldest daughter and felt guilty discussing his youngest daughter's marriage plight.
"Seorin, the crown prince wants to marry Sang-Hee," Jin Young said. "The latest the date of wedding can be postponed is at the start of the next year."
Seorin lowered her head and laughed inwardly. She knew her father's motive for telling her about Park Sang-Hee's good news wasn't so that she could say to Sang Hee, "Sang-Hee ~ah, congratulations."
What her father wanted to say was, 'your little sister wants to get married, you should think about your little sister's situation and prepare yourself mentally to quickly find a husband so that you won't interfere with your little sister's auspicious wedding day.'
The culprit behind her father's coercing her to find a husband was Princess Ji Hoon's powerful influence.
"It isn't right for Sang-Hee to be married before her older sister," Jin Young said.
Jin Young sighed endlessly and felt incredibly guilty.
Seorin appeared to look guiltier than her father. "Father, it's my fault for causing you to worry."
Seorin thought it was pointless for her father to start feeling guilty. But every time the usual guilty expression was visible on her father's face, she loved to respond to it by appearing more humble and apologetic to make his conscience eat up his stomach.
Jin Young saw the way his oldest daughter was incredibly humble and understanding, it made it hard for him to face his oldest daughter.
"Seorin, do you have someone you admire?" Jin Young asked. "If you tell me who it is, I'll act accordingly as your father."
The corner of Seorin's mouth curved upward slightly and she spoke in the gentlest tone. "I have no one in my heart. I leave it up to father to make arrangements for me."
On the surface, she sounded like a filial daughter. But in her heart, she didn't believe her father regarded her highly or that his main intention was to find her a good husband.
She didn't want to waste time opposing her father. It was better for her to act submissive and filial. What alternative did she have? To find the crown prince and tell him her grievances that her father didn't care about her marriage state? She was a realistic person and knew the outcome would be the same, she would be forced to be married off to a man who supposedly was 'intelligent and strong.'
She wondered about the unlucky intelligent and strong man who would be 'persuaded' to be her husband.
"Tomorrow there'll be a banquet at the palace in honor of the crown prince," Jin Young said. "Seorin, you'll be attending the banquet too. If you meet anyone that you like, tell me... Seorin, don't worry, I won't let Ji Hoon and Sang-Hee find you an unsuitable man to marry you off. If you don't approve of any of the men you meet then I won't approve of them either."
Jin Young looked at his oldest daughter lowering her head for a while and he didn't want to put more pressure on her. He silently left the courtyard in a state of worry.
She raised her head after her father left the courtyard and she smiled mockingly. If she met a man at the banquet who was high in the sky, she doubted her father was capable of putting his pride aside and beg the emperor to command the prominent man to marry her.
Her father valued pride too much to lower himself. It was laughable that he thought he could make everything flow smoothly by voicing a promise he couldn't keep. To an outsider, his empty promise would deeply move them. But her father broke too many promises in the past. Why did he think that she could still believe his words were true?
Especially that year he promised her mother, "in this life I only need you."
Yet her father chose ambition, status, and riches and betrayed her mother by marrying another woman.