“Even if you tear me to pieces or even if you reduce me to ashes, I would still go back and give you my heart.” Anonymous -Turtlequote.com.
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“Yuna, did something happen?” Ask your mom. She walked in your room and sat at the hem of the bed. After that night when Jimin pushed Ara, you left the house with the kids. You couldn’t stand being in the same place as Jimin, not at that moment. Not after he touched your child. That was his last straw. You were done with him. What you hated the most was he knew what he did would anger you, but did it anyway.
You knew Jimin never cared for his kids or you, but he took it too far. You can't forgive him, not after what he did to Ara. “Nothing, mama, I just miss your company.” As much as you love your mother, this conversation wasn't something you wanted to talk about. You know she is only asking because she felt worried, but you don't need this talk. What you need right now is a rest; you didn't sleep well last night. Your thoughts had consumed your head that you barely slept.
Your mother just glanced at you; from the way you absorbed yourself in a ball tugging your legs close to your chest, she felt as if something had happened. Your mother knew you well. She knew when something was going on with you and right now she could tell. “Baby, did you and Jimin fight? Did something happen that you are not telling me about?”
She shouldn't know about your relationship with Jimin. You want to tell her, but how? You rather tell her you are okay; that you just miss her, but you know you aren't okay. You are hurting and telling your mom that sounds even worse; you didn't want her worrying about you. You couldn't imagine telling her about you and Jimin.
Hey, mama, my husband hates me, he doesn't even like his own kids, or mama my husband and I are only together because of the kids. Or my husband has been cheating on me with his ex-girlfriend, and I know about it, but allow it because I don’t want my kids to grow up without their father. That's hard even coming out of your mouth.
“Baby…” her voice trails off, a wave of sadness overcomes her as tears jump out of her eyes. They pile over each other, quarreling hard to not crawl down, but it does. “Mama, don’t cry,” you unscramble yourself as you try soothing her, you hate seeing your mother cry, particularly over * like this, well maybe not * like this, because this is bigger than * itself. But you hate seeing it. You didn’t want to be reminded about your childhood.
“Yuna…” she was so choked with tears that she struggled to speak. “Mama nothing is wrong,” you lie, but your mother knows you better, she knows when you’re lying, and right now she can tell, she can see the lies written all over your face.
“Well, what is it?”
“Mama…”
“Yuna, don’t lie to me. I’m your mother, and I need to know.” Does she? Can she deal with it?
“Yuna, please, I need to know. What are you hiding, huh, baby?” Her hands travel to your hands, holding them together. You glance her in the eyes, her red-rimmed eyes staring at you. It's been a long time since you've seen those eyes. This was the look they always welcomed you with whenever you came back from school; she always had those eyes staring at you the same way she is doing now.
“Mama… I-”
“Yuna, is everything alright?” Your mouth opens to speak, but nothing comes out. Mama, a tiny voice in your head rang, the tears which you tried holding on to succumbing, as you broke down. You couldn't hold it in anymore, it pangs your heart the more you kept those tears in.
~
Is Mrs. Park here yet? It wasn’t long ago when Namjoon came to work. He has been waiting for you but hasn't heard from or seen you. When he asked one of the staff, they confirmed you weren’t here yet; it worried him; he remembered taking you home and making sure you were okay, but why aren't you here? Did something happen? He wasn't sure if he was just overthinking or if something occurred, but all he could do now was worry; as the line on his forehead deepens. When he tried contacting you, you didn’t answer, which made him more worried.
“Namjoon?” he heard a voice call, looking up his eyes to meet with a buff guy whose hair was tied into a man bun; the man had tight jeans and a white t-shirt. He walks up to Namjoon and smiles. “I was calling you, but you weren’t listening to me. Are you okay?” Pulling the chair out, he sat down.
“Jackson, what are you doing here?” Namjoon ignored the man's question as he straightened his posture. “You forgot, didn't you?”
“What?” Namjoon didn't care but asked. “Seriously?” Says Jackson, his eyes widened, staring at Namjoon in disbelief; as if Namjoon had just killed someone.
“I know you hated me and Aya for what she said about your mother, and me defending her, but I never thought you'd hated us this much.”
“Oh, I thought it was something more serious.” The only thing that Namjoon cares about is you. You are the only thing on his mind. He wants to know how you are doing? If you are okay? Namjoon stares at the computer, not even glimpsing at the man who sat in front of him with widened eyes. As Namjoon's thoughts got the better of him, he got out of his chair and made his way to the door. Just as he was about to leave, Jackson spoke.
“Where are you going?” Jackson's brows lift as he veers around to the man who was still sitting at the desk. “Somewhere more important,” Namjoon says, opening the door and leaving.
“Mrs. Jung, I am leaving. I don’t feel good,” Namjoon says to the woman sitting at her desk typing on her computer. Mrs. Jung nods her head.
~
“I want you back. I love you.”
“What are you thinking about?” Areum jolted up from the voice behind her. She didn’t even know how long she was repeating and thinking about the same thing for. But as she gape at the time she scratches her head. Areum's roommate drew over to her; she wanted to know what Areum was thinking about. Rolling her eyes slightly at how close her roommate was, she scoots over. “Nothing.” She looked at the TV, hoping that her nosey roommate would leave her alone, but she didn't. Instead, she smirked and spoke.
“Was it the man from two days ago?” Areum says nothing but hesitates at the mention of the man. How did she know? “He is handsome, no doubt about that, but what about Jimin? Don't you love him?” Chuckling bitterly at her roommate's snarky remark, she gets up and leaves. “Where are you going?” Areum stops and turns to the woman sitting on the couch. “Getting away from you.” As soon as she closes the door behind her, her body drops on the bed, thinking about Jason's words.
“Areum, I love you. I'm sorry that I hurt you. But I really love you and I know you do, too.” She loved him, but Jimin. How would she tell Jimin about this? She has come too far to stop her affair with Jimin; she even made him push his daughter.
If she does and goes back to Jason, what might happen? Will he do what he did to her before? Shower her with love, make her feel special and when he gets bored, accuse her of cheating? Did he really change like he said? Her brain was going to burst any moment if she kept thinking about this; her thoughts weren't the best with men. She lay on her back as her head lay down on the pillow. The thought of Jimin occupied her mind.
He loved her like she was a princess, complimenting her on the little things she did. Do anything for her when she asks with no second thoughts. He truly loved her. But… Jason showed her a type of love she had never experienced. Their love was dangerous and toxic, but a love where if she was given a chance to go to, she had no second thoughts. Jason treated her like a woman. Jason's love was hard, intense love. She never experienced hard love. With all the men she was with, Jason was the only one that stood out.
The only one that allowed her to be herself and didn't shame her for it. She felt like a queen when she was with him; like she was the only woman in the world, well, his world. The feeling of being with a man that lets you explore anything you wish to. She loves that. He let her do what she pleased. With Jimin, she had to act a certain way so people would like her. So people would praise her. But with Jason, none of those things mattered.
She didn’t have to worry about people shaming her, because it was only them against the world. Areum rolls over, this time gazing at her phone and the amount of messages Jason had sent her. He really wants me back. That was the thoughts she had as she stared at the phone. She had little time to think because Jason was leaving at the end of next month and he needed to know her answer; he needed to know if she wanted to be with him.
~
Jimin was busy in the kitchen when he heard the doorbell ring. Placing the knife on the counter, he walks to the door; to his surprise, he never expected your boss to be at the door. The * he doing here? “Can I help you?” Jimin's nostrils flared as he stared at Namjoon; he never expected him. “Um, sorry to bother you, but is your wife here?” Ask Namjoon. His eyes roam around the house from outside. Jimin's eyes looked at Namjoon up and down. “Wife?”
“Yes, your wife Yuna,” replies Namjoon.
“I see you even call her by her name,” he lets go of the door and folds his arms together as he lay against the door frame. “Is she here?”' Namjoon ignored Jimin's comment. “I'm not sure. Why don't you call her and ask her?”
“I did, but she didn't answer. That's why I am here.” Jimin says nothing for a minute and stares at the man; a hint of worry fills Namjoon's eyes as his eyes roam inside the house. “Sorry to break it to you, Mr. Kim, but the person you came here looking for is not here and I don't know where she is,” Jimin emphasized as he shut the door in Namjoon's face.